I made myself a few little affirmation cards. Encouraging words to keep me going. I love them. I had this box of artist trading cards made from watercolor paper. And I'm always writing down little quotes and phrases on sticky notes and cocktail napkins. So, I got out the markers and these cards, and cute-i-fied some of them. They make me happy.
Then I had a brilliant idea: making them to share. They arrived yesterday. I'm tickled pink.
Well, this has become a familiar site lately, hasn't it? A mug full of coffee, brightly painted canvas, and a messy workspace. I promise to become more diverse after the holiday show season gets underway. But right now? This is my everyday existence. I come in, I sit down, I doodle. Hello? How fun is that???!!!
Today, just to add a little more chaos, I have sprayed fixative onto my canvas. I think I might be a wee bit high. (I've opened the window. No cause for alarm.) Anyway, this whole painted canvas thing is sort of an experiment. I drew over the paint with watercolor crayons, and I want those lines to stay put. Hence, the fixative spray. After it dried, I rubbed my fingers over the crayon, and didn't get any smudging, so I think that may have worked. Brilliant.
And, since my little freak out the other night, I seem to be blissfully back to my peaceful state. I wish I could really make you understand what an unusual thing this is for me. Truly. I'm sort of a drama queen. I kind of thrive on stress. And if there's not enough of it occurring naturally, I happily create some myself. It's crazy, really. And this "all is well in my world" attitude is so much more pleasant. And I'm not positive about this, but I think I'm a little easier to live with. Maybe. Hey, it's not easy being me. (And as My Beloved would tell you, "Honey, it's not easy being with you.") I get it.
Anyway, I have my To-Do-List Majora (that's Latin for big-ass-list-of things-that-need-to-get-done). And it's not freaking me out. At. All. I just go down the line, check things off, pick something else to work on, and get 'er done! What the what? Who are you?, and give me back my body!
So, the countdown is on! Two weeks from today, I'll be packing up my sister's minivan (oh, so bad for my image! But only so much stuff will fit into Maude the Pod when the top is up. *deep sigh* My fantasy of vintage VW van ownership is achingly present these days. Can't you see it? Bright orange, white roof, moon hubcaps, and Tammy-fied into cuteness?! But I digress.) Packing that van I'll be, and toddling off to my first show of the season. Excited and terrified, all at the same time!!!
Back to the "ta-dah" list. Back to work. Back to blissing out in the studio. See you later!
Preparing for five shows (possibly six, jury is still out), has created the most ridiculous to-do list. It's in one of my journals, and takes up three pages. Three pages!! And it sort of freaked me out the other night. The freak-out went something like this:
"What was I thinking?!! Five, possibly six, holiday art fairs?! In a five-week time-frame? Starting in less than three weeks?! I'll never get it all done! No one will buy my art anyway! Why am I doing this??!!"
All of which was met with a head-cocked-to-one-side, ball-in-mouth, tail-wagging Kip. Literally looking at me, unimpressed, as if to say, "Yeah, but here's my green ball!"
And that's when it happened. A paradigm shift. My a-ha moment.
I can freak out and slog through the next eight weeks. Or. I can take a deep breath, enjoy the process. Love.It.Up.
I chose to do these art fairs. I love what I'm creating right now, and I do believe other people will, too. Yes, it's a lot of work, but it's all fun stuff! And that's when my to-do list became my ta-dah! list. Instead of feeling panicky about all the preparation, I've decided to focus on the process of creating the prettiest booth, the most joyful art, the cutest outfit (you know it always comes down to the outfit!). So, rather than simply checking off a box upon completing a task on the to-do list, I throw my arms up in the air and squeal "ta dah!!"
Then I throw the ball for Kip.
Everybody wins.
Had a little break in the rain this morning, so I skeedaddled out to the garden to take some photos. I love the fresh feeling of a morning-after-rainy-night. My flower pots are still lovely because we've enjoyed such nice weather this fall, and with a little kiss of moisture, and under the gray cloud cover, they just look especially beautiful this morning. I had to share.
I've been so reisting the change of seasons from summer to fall this year, because our summer came so, so late to the Pacific Northwest. I just wanted it to last a little (really...a lot) longer. And, the truth is, I've been riding around town topless up until this week. So. I can't complain. And, I feel sort of ready now. Ready to cozy into wool sweaters and candlelight and apple crisp.
The hardest thing for me to let go of when the weather turns cool? My flip flops. Anyone else? I know! I live in them all summer long. But, let me tell you something. Hot flashes? I pretty much loathe them, but I will say, they're keeping me in flip flops, even though the weather has turned cooler. You've got to make lemonade out of lemons, right? If I must have hot flashes, at least I can have them in flip flops. hahaha
The cooler weather beckons me to the studio, too. Which is a good thing, since at last count I have been accepted to five art fairs. I'm giddy with excitement, tickled pink! Truly. So, I'm grateful for the rain this morning, because it's moved me into megacreativemode. I took time yesterday to plan out the next three weeks before the Llewellyn HolidayMarket and Abernethy Art & Craft Fair. I'm a planner. Must know what needs to happen when, in order to get it all done. I literally printed out calendars from the internet, and laid out daily goals to keep me on task. Because. With so much to do, I tend to become a deer-in-headlights. There's so much, that I get a little bit paralyzed. But not today. No siree! In fact, I feel pretty good about my timeline, my tasks, and how they're all fitting together. Again...that "everything is happening just as it should be" mode. Seriously. It's like some benevolent alien has booted my inner critic and settled in to soothe me into the whirl of holiday art fairs. I'm a little blown away by it. So not my usual modus operandi. Am riding this wave as long as I can.
In the meantime, I made fresh chocolate chip banana bread yesterday afternoon. Am settled in to my studio chair, with a steamy mug of coffee in one hand, paint brush in the other. Lucky, lucky girl.
A musician must make music, an artist must paint, a poet must write if she is ultimately to be at peace with herself. What she can be, she must be. Abraham Maslow*
I was thinking about my life the other day. (I know. Heavy.) And I was thinking how I feel like the luckiest person on the planet. I feel like I am really creating the life I've been dreaming of for so, so long. Truly. All the planets have aligned, doors are opening, the universe is responding...and I am happy. And at peace with myself.
Can I get an Amen! and a Hallelujah! please?!
Up until about a month ago, I felt like I was in a constant struggle with the creative side of my life. And, even though I've been creative all of my life, things just didn't feel like they fit quite right. You know, what I mean? Like the jeans you've been wanting to buy for weeks and weeks because they look so darn cute and comfy in the store...then you get them home, and you like the way they look (mostly), and the fit is (very nearly) perfect. And yet...hmmm...not quite right. So into the closet, on the top shelf, they go.
I think it must be the combination of my daily journaling exercise, art fair-induced deadlines, and just simply opening myself up to trying new things creatively that has uncorked this bubbly, effervescent, sweet and tasty creative champagne. I feel slightly art-drunk all day long. (And without the hangover!) I have so much work ahead of me, but it doesn't scare me, or stress me out (or not as much) as it has in the past. I have this calm, peaceful, "everything is happening exactly as it should be" presence right now. Even the part of me that would usually say, "just wait for the other shoe to drop, little missy!" is silent right now. And that? Is blissful.
I hope you're finding the same smooth waters on your creative journey today. And if things feel a bit wavy and bouncy and sea sicke-y, I hope you'll take a little mini-vacation for this to do list:
Things To Do Today:
(*Sorry Mr. Maslow...I had to edit your quote for gender so that it spoke more directly to me.)
I've applied to be a vendor at numerous holiday art fairs this coming holiday season. I'm really excited about the possibility, and of course, really nervous awaiting acceptance. I thought I'd show you some of the work I sent with my applications. I've been painting, painting, painting, and having so, so much fun with it. I hope that will shine through in my applications.
Two of the earliest shows of the season that I applied for have chosen me as a vendor, and I'm thrilled, thrilled, tickled pink!! I'll be showing my work (and selling it, too!) at the Llewellyn Holiday Market and at the Abernethy Arts and Craft Fair in November. I'll post more information as I have it, and if you're a Portland local please come by either or both shows.
They are both fundraisers for local elementary schools, which makes me feel really good. As an artist, I'll be donating a portion of my profits from those events to each school. And we all know how our schools can use every dollar they can get. So, come, buy, visit, enjoy!
I've heard really great things about both of these events, and there will be lots of art to see, so put November 12-13 on your calendar for the Llewellyn Holiday Market, and November 14 for the Abernethy Arts and Craft Fair. And I'll keep you posted on other events as I learn about them, which should be towards the end of next week. I'm really excited. (And still nervous, so keep your fingers crossed and send all that good juju my way, won't you?)
I took a little break today to work on Jeanne's art journal.
Never mind that I've had it over a year. (Seriously. Where has the time gone?! It seems to go faster and faster, on some sort of warp-speed, super-mach trajectory.)
Anyhooo...me and my Artfiberfest friends Linda, Cindy, Juanita and Jeanne decided to do a round-robin art journal exchange. Big fun! But, somewhere along the line, life got busy, and those journals sort of got shoved to that old back burner. You know. The one that never gets used.
Until this weekend, that is. This weekend, when Jeanne emailed me and said:
Hi Tammy,
First things first. It was supposed to rain on Friday. Well. Lots of clouds. However. Never any rain. It was awesome. We walked along the promenade, ate fish and chips at our favorite spot, did some shopping. Fun. Good day.
These photos are the view from our condo. Not ocean front, but as long as I can see the water, I'm pretty happy. What is it about the water? Do you have the same reaction? I feel so much calmer. A lot more grounded. I just feel better at the ocean. I feel it a liiitttllee big on a river or lake, but I really groove at the ocean. Something about the tide maybe. The rhythm of the waves. I don't know, but I like it. Always. Calms. Me. Down.
This is the carousel in town...not a great photo, and the clown sort of freaks me out, but I wanted you to see the blue sky. Gorgeous. Happy sight.
And this? Oh. This is my pound-and-half of hand-picked-by-yours-truly salt water taffy that is a mandatory event at each and every trip to the beach. And, yes, I have on flip flops. I mean, how much better can it get?! It's October! At the beach! I'm in flip flops! I KNOW!!!!
Bagels by the Sea is all foxxed up for Halloween. Always have to stop here for a bagle and schmear.
My favorite: the "works" bagel (lots of seeds and salt) with mild pepper cream cheese, and the requisite diet soda, plus a glass of water because I'm very big into hydration right now....helps with those damn hotflashes.
My favorite window boxes along Broadway.
I am totally stealing the mini-pumpkins-in-my-flower-pots idea, aren't you?
So adorable!
Stopped in for a bit of nostalgia (it even smelled old in there)...
I hated these things as a kid. I always wound up with a headache. I loved the look of them, though. And I just wanted to drive it around the loop, minding my own business, if you don't mind. I just hated it when people bashed into me!! I wanted to scream, "hey, leave me alone, I'm driving, here!" Sheesh. So. I had a very short bumper car career. (*sigh*)
Always felt better after having one of these, though. I mean, come on! It's a deep-fried weenie. In corn bread. Hello?
Mmm mmm good.
My friend Goosey sent me this quote from Marianne Williamson the other day:
I've been playing with my paintbox. A little inspiration coming from my morning art journal sessions. I've had this little whisper in my heart to paint. It's been there for awhile now...over a year...maybe longer than that. I have resisted, resisted, ignored, ignored. "I can't paint." "I'm sewing and stitching...I'm not a painter." And on and on it goes. In my art journal, I've been playing with the idea of painting. The idea of adding that to my artist's tool box. Why not? I mean, really? Why do I think I can't paint? When did I tell myself that? And why did I believe it? Phooey! I'm going to paint! And so, I am.
I'm using all of the colors that I love. And just doodling, like I do in my journal, really. Only, paint has replaced my Copic markers, and a bit of plywood has become my page.
I feel inspired! I'm having a blast!! I'm loving the colors, and the designs, and practically everything about this process! Who knew?!
My hands do remember how to do this...even though it's been so long since I painted anything besides a piece of furniture. I'm having fun. Gaining a little creative momentum. Getting comfortable with all of my little brushes. Adding little highlights here and there.
So. Here it is. My first piece. Appropriately titled "No. 1". A little reminder to myself to be bold, practice bravery, and be gentle with myself as I sprout my painter wings. More to come.
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